Quotes

Without humility we can not be pleasing to God. ~ St. Faustina Kowalska

It is necessary for you to fight against the devil every day under the leadership of Christ ~ St. Caesarius of Arles

All who do the Gospel work of love belong to Christ and serve Christ. Let us seek to recognize his invitation to join together in doing good in his name in all the ordinary circumstances of life. Let us be willing to accept that invitation even when it requires of us hard and selfless choices, that our lives may reveal God's love rather than give scandal to the vulnerable. ~ Magnificat, 10-01-06

God calls His people to live at a standard higher than the unbelievers who surround them so we can be a light and a standard for the rest of the world. ~ John Maxwell, Leadership Promises, 10-01

Today, Lord, I thank you for being so good...and so good to me. Thank you for what you've done and for what you're doing in me. Be praised, and let me live to glorify your name. ~ Lose it for Life, 11-18

It is not on the authority of the Church that we accept Jesus, but on the authority of Jesus that we accept and love the Church. So the first thing the Church has to do is not present herself to the worlds, but present Jesus. ~ Fr. Raniero Cantalamessa

What He is Making

When a man turns to Christ and seems to be getting on pretty well (in the sense that some of his bad habits are now corrected) he often feels that it would now be natural if things went fairly smoothly. When troubles come along -- illnesses, money troubles, new kinds of temptations -- he is disappointed. These things, he feels, might have been necessary to rouse him and make him repent in his bad days; but why now? Because God is forcing him on, or up, to a higher level: putting him into situations where he will have to be very much braver, or more patient, or more loving, than he ever dreamed of being before. It seems to us all unnecessary: but that is because we have not yet had the slightest notion of the tremendous thing He means to make of us. ~ C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

Home

It feels so good to be home. I love my house. I love getting back to my routine. Sometimes I think I love it so much that I miss out on the joys of traveling because of it.

I did have a good time this weekend. I didn't quite feel like my normal upbeat self. I'm still sad about my nephew's death. We had fun Friday night. I enjoyed dinner (Greek food) and the concert (The Rippingtons) and dessert (cheesecake) afterwards. We rode the DART train into downtown Dallas so that was much more relaxing than driving.

Saturday though I was just bleh though. Sugar Pop noticed and asked if I felt ok. I just wasn't my normal happy, upbeat self. Sugar Pop's family is very talkative and I just didn't feel like talking. It is very easy to sit and say nothing. I normally join in the conversation, but I just didn't feel like making conversation. I was tired and sad and would have been quite happy to just sit and read a book. I spent a long time looking at the new JCPenny catalog.

But Sunday I woke up in a great mood because it was Time to Go Home! I am happy to be home and could only be happier if I didn't have to go to work today.

Prayer Closet

Sugar Pop and I took a driving trip this weekend. It was six hours each way. Sitting in a car for 12 hours gives me LOTS of time to think. I wore myself out with all that thinking.

I thought about feature I like about my house, things I would have different if I built one, how I would like to live in a small town, how I long for a simple life.

I did a lot of thinking about how neat it would be to have a "prayer closet." It would be the size of a walk-in closet. It would be big enough for a small barrel-back chair, a kneeler, a mantle to hold candles and such, and a book case or some shelves. I would have a light fixture in it that came from an old church. I would paint the walls in a metallic gold and hang icons on the walls. I would burn some incense so it would smell church-y. I would have a CD player in there so I could listen to worship music.

Fitness Friday

Having a plan last weekend helped tremendously. I didn't stick to it perfectly, but it gave me guidance and made me mindful of my weekend choices.

This week has been fairly good. My nephew's vigil and funeral threw some abnormality into my week and Tuesday I didn't do well on my healthy habits at all (eating was overboard, no exercise at all). However, I issued myself a 2-day 100% Healthy Habit Challenge for Wednesday (100%) and Thursday (only missed 2 for 93%) which got me right back in control.

Now I am facing a three-day weekend away from home. We are leaving for Dallas this morning (a 6 hour drive) and going to a concert tonight. We'll be staying with Sugar Pop's parents tonight and tomorrow and driving home Sunday. Trips like this used to really through me off my plan sometimes for weeks at a time, but I have gotten much better at eating sensibly away from home and resuming my healthy habits immediately. I have a small spiral that I started taking on trips last April. I use it to track my healthy habits, food, exercise, and tips to myself for future trips. This has proven very helpful. I can see what stumbling blocks to watch out for and can remember things that helped me stay on track.

Do I sound like a tyrant with myself? Don't start thinking that I don't allow myself to splurge. I am all about splurges, but it is very important that I keep them controlled. Losing control leads to binging and I am NOT going down that road again. I have made a commitment to myself (and God) to not binge ever again. (Today will be 105 days binge-free.) By keeping track of my eating and exercise, avoiding potential triggers, and relying on God for my strength, I will continue to remain binge-free. Journalling so extensively keeps me honest. When I stop all the journalling, unhealthy habits start to creep in and the pounds start to creep on. Journalling is not slavery to me, it is the tool I use to ensure my freedom from being controlled by food.

Good News for a Change

Butterfly is Pregnant!

Due date is 3/7/2008.

I needed some good news today.

Mood

I am in a horrible mood. It feels like bad PMS, but it is not that time of the month. My husband is grating on my nerves. It is NOT him, it is me. My normal self is happy and easy to get along with, today (and last night too) I want to be left alone! How do people who are like this all the time stand themselves?

I need a HUGE attitude adjustment because I have a 3 day weekend with my husband starting tomorrow.

Pray for me. I need it.

Sometimes God gives us tasks that seem overwhelming because He wants us to get the rest of our lives in order so there is time for those tasks. ~ Unknown

Greatness is verified in being a servant to others. ~ Unknown

You can reach your potentials tomorrow if you dedicate yourself to growth today. Remember, to change your world, you must first change yourself. ~ John Maxwell, Leadership Devotional, 8/26

Whether we fight against the ambition of the world, against the desires of the flesh, or against the darts of heretics, we are always armed with the Lord's cross. ~ St. Leo the Great

Sacrifices made for God have a sweetness and a joy unknown to the world. ~ St. Pierre Henri Dorie

The notion that one gains freedom by rebelling against God has been a popular illusion since Eden. The paradox of the gospel is that we are set free from the cains of our own making by choosing to yoke ourselves to Christ, who bursts our bonds by his own death and resurrection. ~ Magnifiat 9-26-06

Hints of Our Future

"We know not what we shall be"; but we may be sure we shall be more, not less, than we were on earth. Our natural experiences (sensory, emotional, imaginative) are only like the drawing, like pencilled lines on flat paper. If they vanish in the risen life, they will vanish only as pencil lines vanish from the real landscape, not as a candle flame that is put out but as a candle flame which becomes invisible because someone has pulled up the blind, thrown open the shutters, and let in the blaze of the risen sun. ~ from "Transposition" (The Weight of Glory) by C.S. Lewis

Last Words

I have no more ailments.

I can breath without oxygen.

I can digest food without enzymes.

I believe with all my heart I am healed.

Jesus Christ has saved my body and soul.

These were the last words that were written by my nephew. I am so saddened by his death, but I know that he is healed. And because of Jesus and the sacrifice He made, I will see him again someday.

In God's Peace (On Early Death)

by John Michael Talbot

The souls of the just are in God's hand
No torment shall ever touch them
In the view of fools they seem as dead
And their passing away an affliction

But they are in God's peace
Suffering a short time, now blessed indeed
But they are in God's peace
For the souls of the just are blessed indeed

Though the just die young, their souls are at rest
In a short time, their soul is perfected
Snatched away lest evil pervert their mind
God sped them away from the world

For they are in God's peace
Suffering a short time, now blessed indeed
For they are in God's peace
For the souls of the just are blessed indeed.

From the book of Wisdom (if you don't have a Catholic Bible you are missing out on some good stuff in Wisdom, read Wisdom 2:12-22 for an excellent prophecy of the Pharisees reaction to Jesus)

For the souls of the just are in the hand of God, and no torment shall touch them. They seemed, in the view of the foolish, to be dead; and their passing was thought an affliction and their going forth from us, utter destruction. But they are in peace. For if before men, indeed, they be punished, yet is their hope full of immortality; Chastised a little, they shall be greatly blessed, because God tried them and found them worthy of himself. As gold in the furnace, he proved them, and as sacrificial offerings he took them to himself. In the time of their visitation they shall shine, and shall dart about as sparks through stubble; They shall judge nations and rule over peoples, and the Lord shall be their King forever. Those who trust in him shall understand truth, and the faithful shall abide with him in love: Because grace and mercy are with his holy ones, and his care is with his elect. (Wisdom 3:1-9)

But the just man, though he die early, shall be at rest. For the age that is honorable comes not with the passing of time, nor can it be measured in terms of years. Rather, understanding is the hoary crown for men, and an unsullied life, the attainment of old age. He who pleased God was loved; he who lived among sinners was transported – Snatched away, lest wickedness pervert his mind or deceit beguile his soul; For the witchery of paltry things obscures what is right and the whirl of desire transforms the innocent mind. Having become perfect in a short while, he reached the fullness of a long career; for his soul was pleasing to the Lord, therefore he sped him out of the midst of wickedness. (Wisdom 4:7-14)

These lyrics and scriptures are in memory of my nephew who passed away yesterday. He suffered from cystic fibrosis and died at the young age of twenty.

May he rest in peace.

Quotes

I do not regret leaving this world; my soul thirsts for the waters of eternal life. My exile is over. I touch the soil of my real country; earth vanishes, heaven opens, I go to God. ~ St. Theophane Venard

All creation sings praise to God by being fully what the creator intended. Obedience to God's designs is in itself an act of worship. Worship without obedience is merely hollow flattery. Yet both worship and obedience are less than Christian if they do not spring from one root, love of God. ~ From the Magnificat 8-17-06

Oh God, Creator and Redeemer, you are the author of being and life. Inspire in us a spirit of praise and desire for obedience, that we may give you glory in everything we think and say and do, through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. ~ From the Magnificat 8-17-06

See, the medicine is prepared for you; the wound of sin must first be healed, and it is alleviated in this way: put wine and oil in it, the oil of trust in the Lord's passion, the wine of remorse in your grief, and mix well. ~ St. Thomas of Villanova

Sin is a subtle prison. So accustomed can we become to its walls that we cease to recognize that w are dying in slow and unseen ways. ~ From the Magnificat 8-25-06

We hear the voice of Christ from the tomb, praying in the name of all of those who are as if dead in the crushing grip of evil, so often disguised as unbreakable habits that may have a certain social acceptability but are nonetheless deadly. ~ Unknown

Fitness Friday

Welcome to the 2nd week of Fitness Friday. I almost forgot that was my new Friday topic.

Yes! My weekly average last week did end up in my goal weight range. Final number was 132.7. This week I am barely hanging into the range. The holiday in the middle of the week has thrown me for a loop. It was my own doing because I didn't have meal plans or exercise plans for the day. Tuesday evening I had a massage after work (it was heavenly) and then Sugar Pop grilled us a wonderful steak dinner. Later we went to Braum's for dessert. I went for the gusto and had the Double Dip Peanut Butter Hot Fudge Sundae (I didn't eat the entire thing - probably just 95% of it). That eating wouldn't have been too bad, but on the 4th we went out for greasy burgers and fries at lunch and then had Chicken Fried Rice for supper. I didn't get any exercise either day - not even my stretching! Thursday's weight was WAY up and I decided to leave it out of my weekly average computation because it was mostly water retention. That was very evident when I weighed this morning and I was down 2 lbs from yesterday morning.

Weekends and Holidays always seem to through me for a loop when I don't make a plan. I have made a plan for the weekend. I have planned meals and planned exercise and I am looking forward to all of it. Even though we have a party to attend tomorrow night, the weekend is going to look much different than the mid-week holiday.

Exercise Plan:
Tonight ~ I was going to run on the treadmill but was feeling too crampy from TOM so we went for a walk and do floor exercises (hand weights, abs, stretching) Saturday ~ Do a lower body Power Half Hour weight routine and at least a 10 minute walk on the treadmill, stretching and abs
Sunday ~ The Power Half Hour Arm Video, a Yoga Video, Run on the treadmill, abs and stretching

Meal Plan:
Tonight ~ Grilled sirloin, corn-on-the-cob, and salad. SF Chocolate Fudge Pudding for dessert. Saturday ~ Normal Breakfast, Big Salads for Lunch, Supper will be at the party (I think it is BBQ). Sunday ~ Normal Breakfast, Chicken Curry in the Crockpot for lunch, and (if the oven gets installed) Oven Fry Chicken for supper. If the oven isn’t ready, then I will do Garlic Lime Chicken.
I am really looking forward to the yoga video and the run afterward. I was able to do that combination a few weeks ago and I felt so AWESOME during the run because I had a really good stretch beforehand.

Next week will be another week at 24 points. The house is finally returning to normal. The oven is the only thing left to do in the kitchen and Honey will be back at her mom's. There shouldn't be anything to keep me from getting back into a good exercise routine. Hopefully, Sugar Pop will be ready to start going to the gym more often. If so, I will start doing Power Half Hour videos right after work for my strength training and then doing cardio at the gym.

Oh, I spent some time last night cleaning out the pantry, freezer, fridge and spice cabinet. It feels so good to look in there now and be able to see everything clearly. I still need to organize the coffee/tea/sweetener cabinet and then all the food storage areas will be nice and neat and my OCPD-ness will be happy!

Emotions

I am feeling emotionally down this morning. Reasons: I didn't eat healthy yesterday, hormones (TOM arrived this morning), I spent a lot of time yesterday looking through old photo albums (scanning pictures for my brother's 60th birthday), and this is the 5-year anniversary of my mother's passing (July 2nd was the day she died and July 5th was her funeral).

So to combat these negative emotions, I listened to worship music on my iPod while I was getting ready. Praise and worship music makes me feel better. I will continue listening to it all day to day. I will also be eating healthy and drinking plenty of water.

Don't Fret

Today's Reading in My Utmost for His Highest is yet another in a long list that is particularly relevant for what I am enduring right now.

We've had several problems recently. They are mostly minor and wouldn't be a big deal if they hadn't all hit one right after another. Yesterday when the wrong color of oven arrived, I had had enough and I was down on my knees praying for the Lord to help me endure. I felt much better after that, because relying on Lord for strength is so much better than relying on myself.

Family Reunion

Saturday was an emotional day.

We had the family reunion for my dad's side of the family. Starting with the last reunion we had four years ago, we have been having a memorial service for the deceased members of the family. It is not a big deal...just acknowledging when they were born and when they died and lighting a candle. I teared up. I wasn't really expecting too. It has been 4 years since Dad died, but he was with us at the last reunion.

Saturday evening I went to church. The worship time was really good. I teared up a little during "Open Our Eyes Lord" which was the last song before communion. I don't know what the worship leader said during the prayer before communion, but that really got the tears flowing.

I still miss my parents terribly. But I am thankful that someday I will see them again because of the Great Sacrifice that Our Lord Jesus Christ made for all of us. Thank you Jesus!

And regarding the question, friends, that has come up about what happens to those already dead and buried, we don't want you in the dark any longer. First off, you just not carry on over them like people who have nothing to look forward to, as if the grave were the last word. Since Jesus died and broke loose from the grave, God will most certainly bring back to life those who died in Jesus. And then this: We can tell you with complete confidence—we have the Master's word on it—that when the Master comes again to get us, those of us who are still alive will not get a jump on the dead and leave them behind. In actual fact, they'll be ahead of us. The Master himself will give the command. Archangel thunder! God's trumpet blast! He'll come down from heaven and the dead in Christ will rise—they'll go first. Then the rest of us who are still alive at the time will be caught up with them into the clouds to meet the Master. Oh, we'll be walking on air! And then there will be one huge family reunion with the Master. So reassure one another with these words. ~ 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18 (The Message)

101 in 1001

I stumbled upon someone with a 101 in 1001 list and I was immediately intrigued and decided to join in. I started my list a few days ago and I am now ready to stop trying to perfect and start completing it.

Beginning Date: July 1, 2007
Ending Date: March 28, 2010
Items Completed: 7 0f 101

Books, Movies, & Music
001. Get a library card
002. Have a Lord of the Rings Movie Marathon
003. Finish watching G.K. Chesterton DVDs
004. Watch Groundhog Day and eat flapjacks on Groundhog Day
005. Watch Season 5 of 24
006. Watch Season 6 of 24
007. Watch the Passion of the Christ on Good Friday
008. Read Pilgrim's Progress
009. Read the Chronicles of Narnia
010. Read the Imitation of Christ
011. Re-Read Beautiful in God's Eyes
012. Re-Read Streams in the Desert
013. Read Lord of the Flies to see why it was required reading in high school
014. Start (and finish) a book by G.K. Chesterton
015. Only listen to jazz for an entire week (excluding workout music)
016. Only listen to classical music for an entire week (excluding workout music)

Places to Visit and People & Things to See
017. Visit New York City
018. See Phantom of the Opera (preferably on Broadway)
019. Meet the man who repairs lawnmowers
020. Visit the Farmer's Market at least three times each summer (3 times in 2007)
021. Go to an outdoor concert
022. Take a scuba class (does not require completing or becoming certified)
023. Take granddaughter to the farm during harvest
024. Visit the farm during cotton harvest
025. Dress up in formal wear and go out with Sugar Pop on prom night
026. Play bingo
027. Go to the Gospel Brunch at the House of Blues
028. Go on an Alaskan cruise

Charitable
029. Use paid4u.com card thirty times
030. Volunteer at a soup kitchen
031. Donate 101 grocery sacks of stuff to Thrift Town (7/101)
032. Redesign Emmaus newsletter
033. Make coloring pages for Kairos
034. Participate in a walk for charity
035. Create a spot to keep and start gathering items for Honey's first apartment

Projects
036. Get a new job
037. Have mom's photos scanned
038. Create recipe book of mom's recipes
039. Create family information book for mom's side of the family
040. Glue completed puzzles together
041. Create slideshow of wedding photos
042. Create and keep a gratitude journal for at least one month
043. Make You Tube video of husband cutting up a watermelon
044. Scan Senior Pictures (completed in August 2007)
045. Scan photos of my brother for his 60th birthday (Completed 7/7/7)

Home & Finance
046. Get 2006 tax information to the accountant
047. Have tax information to the accountant by March 1st
048. Prepare a Will
049. Update CD inventory
050. Have the guest bathroom redone
051. Plant a bulb pot
052. Plant winter wheat in the fall
053. Clean new oven at least once each year
054. Trim hoya plants and pot "babies"
055. Recover dining room chairs
056. Take a defensive driving course to get the auto insurance discount
057. Get a safety deposit box
058. Organize husband's music business expenses
059. Create a real FlyLady control journal
060. Refer to above control journal daily for six months
061. Help Honey with daily routine during summer visit
062. Sell something on Ebay

Body
063. Have a foot detox spa
064. Rock wall climbing
065. Run in a 5K
066. Maintain average weight below 135 for 12 months in a row (2/12)
067. Reach body fat % below 23% (on Tanita scale)
068. Get a massage every month for six months in a row (3/6)
069. Run 30 minutes at 6.0 mph (completed 8/17/07)
070. Try on wedding dress on or near 10 year wedding anniversary
071. Still fit in wedding dress on or near 10 year wedding anniversary
072. Have my first mammogram
073. Order (and learn) a line dancing video
074. Try Weight Watchers Core Plan for one week
075. Have legs waxed
076. Don't check my weight for an entire month
077. Have sun damage on my forehead corrected
078. Use personal trainer appointments that came with my gym membership
079. Have a spa day

Food & Drink
080. Make homemade ice cream
081. Eat black-eyed peas on New Year's Day
082. Find 10 new "keeper" crock pot recipes
083. Give up Chocolate for Lent
084. Make snow ice cream
085. Make cream puffs for Honey
086. Make Frito pies on Halloween
087. Drink a $50 bottle of wine
088. Try raw milk
089. Bake a Flourless Chocolate Cake
090. Cook a Greek recipe from the cookbook Butterfly gave us
091. Make Pasta E Fagioli Soup
092. Have a "duck fart" with my dear husband and laugh about old times (completed 8/4/7)

Things to Buy
093. Buy an electric tea kettle and use it at work (purchased 7/4/7, haven't used yet)
094. Try (possibly buy) a Wacoal bra
095. Order personalized M&Ms for my goddaughter
096. Buy a new (to me) vehicle
097. Buy myself fresh flowers at least once a month
098. Buy a new (smaller) digital camera
099. Buy and set up a wireless router
100. Get mattress topper for the guest bed (completed 8/9/7)
101. Purchase a natural light desk lamp (completed 9/12/7 - one for home and one for work)

Fitness Friday

This blog is supposed to be about spiritual and physical fitness, but I mainly been using it as my spiritual journal and don't seem to talk about my physical fitness much. I decided to make Friday's "Fitness Friday" and let you know I am doing physically.

This week my weekly average is going to be finally be in my (revised) goal weight range of 130-134. I won't know the exact number until Sunday. My original goal weight range was 127-131, but Sugar Pop thinks I look to thin below 130. I didn't believe him at first, but when I saw the pictures of myself from GMA Week I decided that I looked pretty good. So, if all goes according to plan (and I don't fall into a vat of candy and ice cream this weekend), I will be back to maintenance points next week. I am so excited. I will start at 24 points a day for next week. I may gradually work up to higher points. I want point I had decided that 27 points was where I needed to be to maintain. I may gradually add 1 point a week to get back to there.

I have set myself a strength training goal for July. I want to get in 4.5 hours for the month. The most I have had up to now is 3.2, so this will be a challenge. I hope to see some good results from the extra time.

Sick Day?

This might be too much information:

I do not feel 100% today. I ran on the treadmill last night and felt great. Then I made supper and as we were sitting down to eat I could feel rumblings in my abdomen. The kind of rumblings that feel like a case of diarrhea might be looming. Later in the evening I did have a spell. Normally once that happens I immediately feel better. But the rumblings continued through the night, but I haven't had any more spells of diarrhea.

I know it is not from what I had for supper as I felt it coming on before then. I could be from a hard treadmill run (30 minutes at 5.6 mph - the fastest I have ever gone), but I would think I would be feeling better by now.

I've considered staying home today, but I don't feel bad enough too. I probably would if I could have the house to myself, but Honey is here and will be all day because she has the day off work.

I always feel guilty taking sick days. Even when I am sick enough to go to the doctor, I still feel guilty.

So...I'm headed to work. Hopefully the rumblings will cease.

A month with Honey

Just a few more days until Honey leaves for church camp. She has been at our house since June 1st. I am ready for the month to be over. Honey is a great kid and she is fun to be around and doesn't give us any trouble (although she did get grounded for a week this month because we checked up on her and she wasn't where she was supposed to be). She never talks back. She will always (eventually) do what you ask her to. She doesn't play her music too load. She does pretty good picking up after herself. I really am lucky to have such a good step-daughter. BUT I am not used to this and I am ready for the month to be over. I always thing that someday she might decide to come live with us all the time. I would love the extra money that would give us (because we wouldn't be paying child support), but I wonder how well I would handle it. Would I eventually turn into a nagging step-mother? I would hope that I wouldn't, but I know there have been days this month that I have had to bite my tongue to keep from being a nag. I think women just have a nag gene. Have you ever met a woman who wasn't "good" at nagging?

Household Chores

Things I take care of around the house
Make the bed almost every day. (Sugar Pop is off on Mondays and sometimes sleeps in so sometimes he makes the bed on Monday.)
Pay bills
Reconcile bank accounts
Meal Planning
Make Grocery List
Grocery Shopping (occassionally Sugar Pop goes with me)
Majority of the house cleaning (However, if it gets bad enough Sugar Pop will do it. He will help if I am cleaning when he is home and is an excellent vacuumer).
Unload the dishwasher
Wash the clothes
Take clothes to the dry cleaners
Send birthday cards
Sweep the garage (Sugar Pop will do it if its gets really bad, but I try to do it weekly)

Things Sugar Pop takes care of around the house
Repairs
Gardening
Makes the coffee every night
Refills the humidifier
Checks the doors at night and sets the alarm

Things we both do
Take out the trash
Check the mail
Fill up our vehicles and get oil changes
Cook supper - We both participate in the process almost every night. Occasionally one of us will do the whole thing.
Clean up after supper - same as above
Ironing

Judgement

Do you have a copy of My Utmost for His Highest Yet? If you've been reading my blog for long, you know that I refer to it a lot. (Next year I will probably be reading Streams in the Desert again, so that will be what I am quoting then.)

Today's Reading said:

Who of us would dare to stand before God and say, "My God, judge me as I have judged others"? We have judged others as sinner -- if God should judge us in the same way, we would be condemned to hell. Yet God judges us on the basis of the miraculous atonement by the Cross of Christ.

Praise the Lord that He doesn't judge the way I do.

Heavenly Father, Help me to look at others through your eyes instead of through my judgemental ones. Amen.

Prayer List

When Job prayed for his friends, the Lord restored his fortunes. In fact, the Lord gave him twice as much as before! ~ Job 42:10

I read this in My Utmost for His Highest today. At one time I had a prayer list of people I prayed for every day. I can not remember the last time I went through that list and prayed for them. I opened it up today and prayed. I have updated it and moved it to an excel spreadsheet that I open every day so that I will see it and remember to spend time in prayer for others. If the Lord blesses me and restores my fortunes (thinking "provides me with a new job") that would be wonderful, but I already feel blessed because I prayed for someone else.

Genovese

Father Frank Pavone wrote in his column this week about the Genovese syndrome. He said:

One of the experiments regarding the Genovese Syndrome began with a man sitting in a room alone. Not knowing the experiment had already begun, he saw smoke pouring into the room from under the door of the next room. He immediately got up and alerted others that there was a problem. Later, three people were placed in that same room, and smoke began pouring in. They coughed and fanned the smoke away from their faces, but nobody got up or said anything.

The experiment showed that we don’t just look at the evidence of an emergency. We look at the reactions of others. If they don’t get excited, we reinterpret the data and conclude that things aren’t as bad as they seem.

The media distorts the reactions of others. There are plenty of people who are upset about the abortion issue and think the killing of an unborn child is a horrible thing, but the media is in favor of abortion and it is reflected in the way the report the issue. They are pro-abortion (or pro-choice as they call it) and they show abortion in a favorable light. This is also evident in the way they are reporting on the environment. They are trying to stir up hysteria about the "greenhouse effect" when there is no scientific evidence to support it.

Scriptures on my Bulletin Board at Work

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. ~ Galatians 6:9

Not as man sees does God see, because man sees the appearance but the Lord looks into the heart. ~ 1 Samuel 16:7

Be glad for all God is planning for you. Be patient in trouble and always be prayerful. ~ Romans 12:12

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. ~ Philippians 4:6

Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. ~ Proverbs 31:30

Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust him and he will help you. ~ Psalm 37:5

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. ~ Proverbs 15:1

Take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. ~ 2 Corinthians 10:5

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. ~ Proverbs 3:5-6

If they obey and serve him, they will spend the rest of their days in prosperity and their years in contentment. ~ Job 36:11

Therefore, prepare you minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be give you when Jesus Christ is revealed. ~ 1 Peter 1:13

The Lord will keep you from all harm -- he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore. ~ Psalm 121:7-8

Let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will know what God wants you to do, and you will know how good and pleasing and perfect his will really is. ~ Romans 12:2

Don't lose a minute building on what you've been given, complementing your basic faith with good character, spiritual understanding, alert discipline, passionate patience, reverent wonder, warm friendliness, and generous love, each dimension fitting into and developing the others. ~ 2 Peter 1:5

What matters is not your outer appearance - the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes - but your inner disposition. Cultivate inner beauty, the gentle, gracious kind that God delights in. ~ 1 Peter 3:3-4

Unless the Lord builds a house, the work of the builders is useless. Unless the Lord protects a city, guarding it with sentries will do no good. ~ Psalm 127:1

The Routine Life

No one is born either naturally or supernaturally with character; it must be developed. Nor are we born with habits--we have to form godly habits on the basis of the new life God has placed within us. We are not meant to be seen as God's perfect, bright-shining examples, but to be seen as the everyday essence of ordinary life exhibiting the miracle of His grace. Drudgery is the test of the genuine character...We all have those times when there are no flashes of light and no apparent thrill to life, where we experience nothing but the daily routine with its common everyday tasks. The routine of life is actually God's way of saving us between our times of great inspiration which come from Him. ~ My Utmost for His Highest

I love my routine life. I miss it when I am thrown out of my routine. My routine has been out of whack for a few weeks now due to our kitchen remodel. But we are getting very close to being finished. I am so ready.

Keeping Company

Monkey see, monkey do. When we spend enough time around those in a particular scene, our actions usually become similar. It is just the way we're made. And it is especially true if the one in the minority is insecure and unsure...All things being equal, if you run with bad company, you will be corrupted. The good won't rub off on them. Their bad will rub off on you. ~ Living above the Level of Mediocrity by Charles Swindoll via the Life Lessons Devotional

I struggle a lot with my eating habits when I am around people who don't eat healthy. At home and in my routine, I do great. But get me out of my routine and put me around people who don't eat the way I do and I pick up their habits quickly. I don't like to draw attention to myself and refusing dessert at a party is one way to quickly draw attention to yourself. (It's not that I don't ever eat dessert, it's just that I like to save desserts for special occasions and then they need to be GREAT desserts; not just a sheet cake at an office birthday party.)

On a good note, our office is going to start Weight Watchers at Work next week. Almost everyone is participating. Which means that the company I keep at work is going to be changing their habits to mine.

It's Time for a New Job

Seth Gogin disagrees with the common adage, “Winners never quit,and quitters never win.” He maintains that successful people know when to quit something that’s not working. The miserable path you’re on may be a dead-end – you need to quit and find another road.

I read this in an email newsletter I receive. I want to remember it as I am looking for "another road."

Serenity in Spite of Trials

People don't recognize God at work in a "perfect" woman -- one with no scars, no troubles, no struggles. But Christ is revealed in a woman who has scars as a result of divine healing, serenity in spite of trials, and peace in the face of uncertainty. ~ The Dieter's Prayer Book

There are people I have met and know that glow with the love of God, even though they are enduring many hardships. My sister-in-law is one. She suffers from MS, but her faith in God is strong and she radiates with the joy of the Lord. Unlike myself. I can fall into a pit of despair because I don't have a kitchen sink. Fortunately my new kitchen sink was installed yesterday.

Listening

Some people are always complaining. Every time you talk to them you get an organ recital. It begins with their liver, then it moves onto their stomach, plantar warts, dandruff. Who knew there were so many organs? You know what holiness is? Listening to all of that as if you had never heard it before. Holiness is listening to the joke your've heard twenty-five times and laughing at the punch line for the twenty-sixth time, while keeping your mouth shut. Holiness is putting up with the gripes of others with tenderness. All of that is holiness. ~ Mother M. Angelica

Listening with love means listening with compassion and sincerity; it means listening without interrupting or zoning out. It means listening without trying to solve the problem. Many times problems disappear into the thin air as soon as they are listened to. ~ Deacon Bill Steltemeier

Judged by a Perfectionist

Saturday we were at a family reunion. I was using the restroom and noticed the hostess had left toiletries on the counter and yeast infection medicine out (and various other things were left out around the house). While I was sitting there I was being judgemental and wondering why she didn't put those things up. She knew she was having company today afterall. Then it occurred to me. This was not about her being a lousy housekeeper. It was about me being a judgemental perfectionistic people-pleaser. She is actually comfortable enough with who she is that she didn't feel the need to have a perfectly clean spotless house and hide the fact that she has a yeast infection. The Judger has been judged.

What you say

When you talk, do not say harmful things, but say what people need--words that will help others become stronger. Then what you say will do good to those who listen to you. ~ Ephesians 4:29 (NCV)

There is someone I work with who could take this verse to heart. I've watched her over the years and I have learned from her. I have learned how I do NOT want to treat employees. She is in a management position. She can be a nice person and do nice things for the employees, but you do NOT want to get on her bad side and there is always one person on her bad side and that person can't seem to do anything right (and if they do, all they get is a back-handed compliment). If they have a problem, it is always an attitude of "what did you do wrong to screw this up." Yes, there are times when people make mistakes and need correction. I do not have a problem with criticizing someone's work, but you need to take the time to politely correct them and teach them. This person doesn't just criticize the work, she will criticize the person, especially if that is the person who is at the top of her sh*t list. There was an employee in our office one time that I loved. She was young, a hard-worker, a fast-learner, willing to please, cute, with a great personality. She was an ex-marine and could take a lot of cr*p. She had the potential to be a wonderful employee. She did have some personal problems and sometimes they affected her work. However, with proper counseling and edification she could have overcome those issues. But no, that didn't happen. This person instead chose to cut her down instead of lift her up. Once the girl was considering getting a dog and she told her, "You can't even take care of yourself. How are you going to take care of a dog?" A statement like that does nothing to bring out the best in someone. It doesn't make them want to try harder. It causes them to shut down and not perform to the best of their abilities. The girl eventually got fired. That has been over a year ago and I still miss her. She was one of my best friends at work. Maybe I should have stood up for her and told the person she shouldn't talk to people like that. But, at one time I was on the top of this person's sh*t list and it is not a place I want to be again. And trust me, if I had said anything, that would have put me on the top of the list.

To paraphrase Huey Lewis, "I need a new job, one that won't make me sick."

A Good Heart

A good person produces good things from the treasury of a good heart, and an evil person produces evil things from the treasury of an evil heart. What you say flows from what is in your heart. ~ Luke 6:45 (NLT)

I got this scripture emailed to me today. (I'm on a list and get a scripture every weekday morning. You can sign up by sending an email.) There are some people in my life that are always negative and there are some people in my life that are always positive. Apparently, this is because of what is in their heart. I've always considered myself a positive person. I have a smile on my face almost all the time. Sure, they are difficult days and days when I am in a bad mood, but I try not to take it out on the people around me. It is (usually) not their fault that I am having a bad day.

This morning I woke up and I had a voice in my head immediately criticizing myself for some things I didn't do yesterday. Bashing myself is NOT a good way to start the day. But then I started making a mental list of the things that I did accomplish and I felt so much better. There were definitely more things done than there were left undone. I am a perfectionist so it is easy for me to spot the bad and the things that are missed. I need to spend more time giving myself (and others) credit for the good and what has been accomplished.

The Lord is my Helper

My assurance is to be built on God's assurance to me. God says, "I will never leave you," so that then I may boldly say, "The Lord is my helper, I will not fear." ~ My Utmost for His Highest

I think I need to repeat the phrase, "The Lord is my helper," over and over and over again. I have lots of worries - not really fears - but worries. Not really even worries necessarily, but thoughts. I'm always planning in my head, what to eat, what to where, when to exercise, how to exercise, the grocery list, the packing list, the snacks for the car, the clothes to pack, the things to do at home, the things to do at work, the next thing I need to do, the thing I need to do in ten minutes, ten hours and on and on and on and on.

And Still Obeys

Screwtape elaborates on the Enemy’s intentions:
Merely to override a human will (as His felt presence in any but the faintest and most mitigated degree would certainly do) would be for Him useless. He cannot ravish. He can only woo. For His ignoble idea is to eat the cake and have it; the creatures are to be one with Him, but yet themselves; merely to cancel them, or assimilate them, will not serve. He is prepared to do a little overriding at the beginning. He will set them off with communications of His presence which, though faint, seem great to them, with emotional sweetness, and easy conquest over temptation. But He never allows this state of affairs to last long. Sooner or later He withdraws, if not in fact, at least from their conscious experience, all those supports and incentives. He leaves the creature to stand up on its own legs—to carry out from the will alone duties which have lost all relish. It is during such trough periods, much more than during the peak periods, that it is growing into the sort of creature He wants it to be. Hence the prayers offered in the state of dryness are those which please Him best...He cannot 'tempt' to virtue as we do to vice. He wants them to learn to walk and must therefore take away His hand; and if only the will to walk is really there He is pleased even with their stumbles. Do not be deceived, Wormwood. Our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our Enemy’s will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of Him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys. —from The Screwtape Letters

All I Need by Bethany Dillon

When the day is done
And there's no one else around
While I'm lying here in bed
You're in my heart, You're in my head
You're all I need, You're all I need
There are a million voices
Calling out my name
But You're the One I want to hear
So make the others disappear

You are all I need when I'm surrounded
You are all I need if I'm by myself
You fill me when I'm empty
There is nothing else
You're all I need

When the morning comes
And Your mercy is renewed
There's a fire in my bones
I'm not afraid to go alone
You're all I need
You're all I need
The sun on my face
I hear You whisper loud
You're still the God that opens seas
Every flower, even me
You're all I need
You're all I need

I'm drawn to everything that You do
Nothing compares with You

I have this song on my workout mix on my iPod. I makes me want to get out and run through a field of wildflowers on a crisp, cool, morning and praise God for the glory of His creation. So far, I haven't had that opportunity, but it works for jogging on the treadmill (and imaging that I'm running through a field of wildflowers).

Discernment

The enemy emphasizes the past, with its mistakes and heartaches, the Comforter exalts the present help of our Lord (Psalm 46:1). The devil delights in taunting us with our weaknesses, and the Lord reminds us of the wealth of his riches in grace. Condemnation concerns itself with our failures; conviction shows us the faithfulness of God. The tempter teases us with immediate gain at any cost; the Trustworthy One tells us of eternal gain, and reminds us of Passion and Patience in Bunyan's House of the Interpreter. The father of lies magnifies our problems, by showing their hopelessness, impossibility, and pain; the God of all grace reminds us of the promises, whereby we can hope against hope; for "suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope; and hope does not disappoint us" (Romans 5:3-5). Thus we know that pain can mean gain.

The false angel of light would have us walk by sight and earthly wisdom ("the counsel of the ungodly," Psalm 1:1); the Lord of life, who sees the end from the beginning, would have us walk by faith (2 Corinthians 5:7), and thereby please our heavenly Father (Hebrews 11:6). The enemy would have us see the hosts of evil against us rather than the hillsides covered with ministering spirits (2 Kings6:15-17). He would keep us dwelling upon the injuries from others, until we become ineffective in service, rather than forgetting the things that are behind and pressing forward (Philippians 3:13-14) in the spirit of Him who said, "Father, forgive them." The Vanquished would have us feel the nails and the thorns, the Victor would have us see the triumph of Calvary's tree.

The discipline of discernment requires that we follow the tenets of divine revelation, lest we fall before the wrath of the tempter. We are to meet his subtlety, selfishness and sophistry in the same way as did the Captain of our salvation, with the unequivocal statement, "It is written" (Matthew 4:4, 7, 10). We also are to live by the Word of God, are not to tempt the Lord our God, and are to worship Him only. We are to believe that as we commit our way unto the Lord and trust also in Him, He brings to pass His will (Psalm 37:5) We are to trust that He is able to fill us with the knowledge of His will (Colossians 1:9), and to protect us from ways of the destroyer. "When the enemy shall come in like a flood, the Spirit of the Lord shall lift up a standard again him" (Isaiah 59:19) As we submit ourselves without reservation unto God, and resist the devil, the latter will flee from us (James 4:7).

By the Word, by the Spirit, by faith, by submission to the divine will, and by resistance to any appeal to self and sin we discern between the way of God and the path of the destroyer. (From The Disciples of Life by V. Raymond Edman via the Life Lessons Devotional)

Simple Peace

The willingness to be and to have, nothing more, nothing less, and nothing else, would set our hearts at rest, and we would discover that the simpler the life the greater the peace. ~ Elisabeth Elliot from The Shaping of a Christian Family via the Life Lessons Devotional.

I desire a simple, peaceful life. I want to eliminate all "unnecessary striving" as Reed Arvin calls it.

Heavenly Father, open my eyes to see those things I can eliminate and give me the faith and courage to release them that through having a simple life I may come to know you more. Amen.

Old People

A friend sent me this:

Crabby Old Man
What do you see nurses? ......What do you see?
What are you thinking......when you're looking at me?
A crabby old man, ..not very wise,
Uncertain of habit ........with faraway eyes?
Who dribbles his food.......and makes no reply.
When you say in a loud voice....."I do wish you'd try!"
Who seems not to notice ..the things that you do.
And forever is losing .............. A sock or shoe?
Who, resisting or not...........lets you do as you will,
With bathing and feeding ...... The long day to fill?
Is that what you're thinking? Is that what you see?
Then open your eyes, nurse......you're not looking at me.
I'll tell you who I am .......... As I sit here so still,
As I do at your bidding, .....as I eat at your will.
I'm a small child of Ten.......with a father and mother,
Brothers and sisters .........who love one another
A young boy of Sixteen ..........with wings on his feet
Dreaming that soon now. ..........a lover he'll meet.
A groom soon at Twenty .........my heart gives a leap.
Remembering, the vows........that I promised to keep.
At Twenty-Five, now .......... I have young of my own.
Who need me to guide ..... And a secure happy home.
A man of Thirty ......... My young now grown fast,
Bound to each other ........ With ties that should last.
At Forty, my young sons ....have grown and are gone,
But my woman's beside me........to see I don't mourn.
At Fifty, once more, .......... Babies play 'round my knee,
Again, we know children ......... My loved one and me.
Dark days are upon me .......... My wife is now dead.
I look at the future ...........I shudder with dread.
For my young are all rearing .......young of their own.
And I think of the years...... And the love that I've known.
I'm now an old man.........and nature is cruel.
Tis jest to make old age .......look like a fool.
The body, it crumbles..........grace and vigor, depart.
There is now a stone........where I once had a heart.
But inside this old carcass ...... A young guy still dwells,
And now and again ........my battered heart swells.
I remember the joys.............. I remember the pain.
And I'm loving and living.............life over again.
I think of the years ....all too few......gone too fast.
And accept the stark fact........that nothing can last.
So open your eyes, people ..........open and see..
Not a crabby old man. Look closer....see........ME!!

Anytime I see an old person, my heart goes out to them. I don't know where this heart from the old came from. The only grandparent I knew was my grandma. She used to come stay with us occasionally. I don't remember a lot about her. She would sit and crochet all day. I can not remember a single conversation with her. I do remember that she tried to teach me to crochet, something that didn't stick because I don't know how. She made me a crocheted doll blanket and an afghan. I got to pick the colors for the afghan. It is obvious that I was in elementary school when I did this - black borders and neon colors. I worked as a unit clerk at a nursing home once. It was one of my first jobs after high school. I liked it. I used to think I wanted to be a nursing home administrator, but now I don't think I would want to deal with all the rules and regulations and such. Being an activity director would be fun, but I don't think the pay would be what I have become accustomed to. Maybe some day I will have an opportunity to volunteer with senior citizens at church, but right now we are involved in a church with mostly young members. For now, I will just stay close to my dear aunts and uncles. I send them emails, birthday cards, and call them occasionally. I am always amazed at how appreciative they are. It is something that doesn't take a lot of effort on my part, but it certainly means a lot.

Spiritually Dry?

I think I am feeling spiritually dry.

I haven't been wanting to put on my cross necklace ("It's too much trouble"). I haven't been wanting to listen to my Christian radio stations ("They keep playing the same songs over and over"). I would rather watch The Beverly Hillbillies or The Cosby Show while I walk on the treadmill instead of EWTN or Beth Moore ("I could use a good laugh"). I would rather blog pictures of food and my kitchen than write about my spiritual life ("I didn't read anything interesting and pictures are easy and I don't feel like thinking so hard").

This is the "Prayer for Power" in my Dieter's Prayer Book this morning:

Dear God,

I truly want to be healed!

At least I think I do.

Show me if there is any part of met that has become content

with a cycle of striving and failing.

I don't want to sit poolside any longer.

I surrender my excuses--

all the reasons why I can't seem to overcome

certain familiar sins or cycles of defeat.

I am ready,

I am willing.

I want to be whole!

I want my life to be full and exciting because I am living it for You.

Don't let me be seduced by the subtle lie

that life is more meaningful when I am wrapped up

in a war with my appetites.

Deliver me.

Heal me, and I will take up my life,

new, fuller,

and give You all my thanks and praise.

Amen.

During my quiet time this morning, I half-heartedly read this and didn't pay much attention to the words. During the time I spent getting ready and particularly getting dressed and spending 10 minutes on the treadmill, God spoke to my heart and revealed to me the places where I have been moving away from Him. I am taking action. I switched the TV to EWTN. I cleaned my cross necklace and have it on. I pulled the Father Stan CD off the shelf and ripped it to iTunes and will take it to work today (I had promised months ago to bring it for a co-worker to listen to and kept forgetting). Today I will make the effort to draw close to God instead of pull away from Him.

Thank you God for speaking to me this morning. Your servant is listening. Amen.

Green Kitchen

Kitchen 05-28 002
Originally uploaded by charity.byar

We spent the day painting yesterday. I've been planning on painting the kitchen this color for a long time, but had a little shock when it started going on the ceiling. We originally planned on painting the walls a shade darker, but decided to paint it all the same once we got started.

My healthy eating is surviving this kitchen work. I've only had abnormal takeout food three times. Last night we had Outback, but it is normal to have that about every other week.

Strawberries

Strawberries
Originally uploaded by charity.byar

Fresh strawberries from our garden, chocolate syrup, fat free whipped topping, and a square of Ghirardelli dark chocolate.

Grace

What is the grace of God? The grace of God says you serve God because you are saved, not in order to be saved. You love people because you're saved, and not in order to be saved. You're not trying to keep a legalistic system, you're responding to a system of love and peace. What is grace? It's what someone gives us out of the goodness of their heart, not out of the perfection of ours. The story of grace is the good news that says that when we come, he gives. That's what grace is. Grace is a pleasant surprise. Grace is a kind gesture. Grace is something you did not expect. It is something you certainly could never earn. But grace is something you'd never turn down. You know what happens when someone sees the grace of God? When someone really tastes the forgiving and liberating grace of God? Someone who tastes God's grace is the hardest worker, the most morally pure individual, and the person most willing to forgive. ~ From The Inspirational Bible, "Grace", via my Devotional Bible

I think this is what is so life-changing about the Walk to Emmaus. During that 3 day weekend you really experience the Grace of God through the Body of Christ. Knowing His grace and experiencing His love changes the way the world looks. It is like seeing things in color instead of black and white. Hence the saying, "De Colores" (in colors).

Fruit Salad

Fruit Salad
Originally uploaded by charity.byar

I made this salad last weekend to take to my sister's house. It contains watermelon, peaches, pears, green grapes, and cherries with a honey, lime juice and cinnamon dressing.

I original saw the dressing recipe on a television spot by the local extension agent when I was in elementary school. The original recipe was just honey and cinnamon, but I added the lime juice last weekend and it seems to keep the fruit from browning too quickly.

Charity's Diet

Charity enjoys a wide variety of colorful fruits and vegetables (excluding raw tomatoes and olives). Favorite fruits are watermelon, frozen grapes, and berries. Favorite vegetables are colorful salads, asparagus, butternut squash, and Healthy Valley Garden Vegetable Soup.

Meats Charity usually eats are lean proteins, particularly chicken breast and beef sirloin, with occasional higher-fat cuts of beef. She likes using various marinades and rubs on grilled meats.

Charity's diet includes 2-3 servings of dairy each day. These are normally Braum's non-fat sugar-free yogurt, Braum's 1% milk, and cheese in limited quanities.

She also tries to include small (28 gm) servings of nuts in her daily diet. Favorites are pecans, cashews, macadamia nuts, almonds and Smuckers Natural Peanut Butter with Honey

The whole grains in Charity's diet come from oatmeal (usually old-fashioned, but occasionally instant) and Garden for Life sprouted grain products.

Healthy fats in Charity's diet come from Smart Balance Spread, olive oil and vinegar salad dressings, nuts (mentioned above), and the occasional avocado.

Chocolate is an important part of any diet, and Charity's favorite treats are Sugar Free Chocolate Fudge Pudding prepared with 1% Milk and Organic Dark Chocolate. She also likes to add 2 tablespoons of cocoa powder in her morning coffee.

Beverages of choice are Ozarka bottled water or reverse osmosis water and green tea. She enjoys one cup of coffee daily containing 1/4 cup powdered milk and sweetner daily. She also enjoys an almost daily glass of wine.

To avoid food cravings Charity avoids refined sugars, flours and processed foods, especially those containing high fructose/maltose corn syrup and partially hydrogenated oils. She does use artificial sweetners including spelda, stevia, and nutrasweet.

Quotes from Brother Lawrence

God alone is capable of making Himself known as He really is; we search in reasoning and in the sciences, as in a poor copy, for what we neglect to see in an excellent original. God Himself paints Himself in the depths of our souls. We must enliven our faith and elevate ourselves by means of the faith, above all our feelings, to adore God the Father and Jesus Christ in all their divine perfections.

The prayer time was really taken at both the beginning and the end of my work. At the beginning of my duties, I would say to the Lord with confidence,

"My God, since you are with me and since, by Your will, I must occupy myself with external things, please grant me the grace to remain with You, in Your presence. Work with me, so that my work might be the very best. Receive as an offering of love both my work and all my affections."

During my work, I would always continue to speak to the Lord as though He were right with me, offering Him my services and thanking Him for His assistance. Also, at the end of my work, I used to examine it carefully. If I found good in it, I thanked God. If I noticed faults, I asked His forgiveness without being discouraged, and then went on with my work, still dwelling in Him. Thus, continuing in the practice of conversing with God throughout each day and quickly seeking His forgiveness when I fell or strayed, His presence has become as easy and natural to me now as it once was difficult to maintain.

Get to know me better...

Here is one of those "get to know me better" things someone sent me:

1. Do you know anyone in Prison?
I know some people who have been in prison.

2. Have you ever logged onto a bf/gf/crush's myspace page?
I don't have a boyfriend/crush, but I have logged onto to my husband's.

3. When is the last time you ate peanut butter and jelly?
I can't remember, but I had peanut butter toast on Saturday.

4. I wonder what happened to question 4?

5. Have you ever gotten naked at a party?
No.

6. Name someone you miss.
My parents.

7. Are you named after a grandparent?
No.

8. Who loves you?
God, my husband, probably my family and close friends.

9. Have you ever broken a rib?
No, thank goodness!

10. Would you rather be a girl or a guy?
Girl.

11. Who is the most spoiled person you know?
Pumpkin - my step-granddaughter.

12. Would you rather have a million dollars or true love?
True Love, but it would be nice to have a million dollars for my true love and I to spend.

13. Have you ever had sex in church?
No, that would just be wrong and weird.

14. Is your boyfriend/girlfriend a marine?
I don't have a boyfriend, but my husband isn't.

15. I wonder what this one was?

16. Would you rather date someone 2 years younger or older?
I'm not interested in dating anyone because I'm married. Sugar Pop is 16 years older than me, by the way.

17. What's your favorite junk food?
I don't really eat any junk food...I guess I would have to say candy.

18. Do you have a porn collection?
No...that's nasty.

19. Is your birthday on a holiday?
No.

20. Are you old enough to vote?
Yes...for 20 years now.

21. Do you have any friends or family in the war right now?
I don't think so, but I have a BIG family so it's possible I could have a distant cousin there.

22. Are you a vegetarian?
No. I'm a Texas Girl - I love my Beef!

23. Do you worry about global warming?
No...God is in control and He created this great planet.

24. Do you like polar bears?
Yes.

25. What song do you want played at your funeral?
There's a Stirring

26. Did you lose your virginity to your neighbour?
No. (Who came up with these questions?)

27. Did or do you think your childhood dreams will come true?
I don't remember what my childhood dreams were.

28. Do you wear your boyfriend/girlfriends clothes?
I have when I had a boyfriend and I thought it was cool to sleep in their t-shirts. Now I'm married and I sleep in the buff (too much information?)

29. Are you a country or city girl/boy?
Country Girl - Learned how to drive a tractor and a car on the same day.

30.Are you taller than 5'6"?
Yes, I am 5'7"

31. Do you consider yourself spoiled?
I consider myself very blessed!

Abundance

The following question was in an email I received from Thrive!:

Do I have an abundance of the things I need to live comfortably?
The term "comfortable" means different things to different people. Make it a goal in your life to not aim for "enough," but to have "more than enough" of what you need -
whether it's time, money, love, space or other precious resources. When you live in abundance, you can focus more clearly on what you want. It empowers you to share yourself, your time, talent, and love more generously.

I did not like this question. I think it implies that we should be striving to increase the resources we have instead of being content with less. I do feel like I have everything I need to live comfortably, because I choose to live below my means. Sugar Pop and I were discussing houses and house payments last night because one of his co-workers is house hunting. When we bought our house, we could have qualified for a bigger house (and a bigger house payment). But because we made the decision to buy a less expensive house, we have more discretionary income to spend on other things and to be able to give more. Because we choose to limit the activities were are involved in, we have more time to spend together and with family. Because we don't have "shows" we must watch on television, we aren't tied to the television schedule. I love living simply and I want to continue to simplify my life because it frees me and enables me to be content with less.

Hope That Never Lets You Down

This is what I received from Joel Osteen yesterday:

Today's Scripture
“Hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.” (Romans 5:5)
Today's Word from Joel and Victoria
Even Christians can sometimes feel hopeless and powerless to overcome adversities. Maybe you feel trapped in your job, (italics mine) or your marriage is in trouble and there doesn’t seem to be an answer. You may have a child who is on the wrong path. Or maybe you are single and have given up any hope of ever meeting the right person. But no matter where you are, God can turn your situation around—and it could start happening today! If you believe with all your heart that God has something great around the corner for you, then hope will take over. God’s hope is such a powerful thing that it can keep you going when practically nothing else can. That’s because God’s hope will never fail or let you down, even if everything else does.
A Prayer for Today
God, thank You for giving me never-ending hope. I confess today that I will live confidently in Your hope because I know I’ll never be let down. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

Having God's "Unreasonable" Faith

"Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you." Matthew 6:33

When we look at these words of Jesus, we immediately find them to be the most revolutionary that human ears have ever heard. "...seek first the kingdom of God..." Even the most spiritually minded of us argue the exact the opposite, saying, "But I must live; I must make a certain amount of money; I must be clothed; I must be fed." The great concern of our lives is not the kingdom of God, but how we are going to take care of ourselves to live. Jesus reversed the order by telling us to get the right relationship with God first, maintaining it as the primary concern of our lives, and never to place our concern on taking care of the other things of life.

"...do not worry about your life..." (6:25). Our Lord pointed out that from His standpoint it is absolutely unreasonable for us to be anxious, worrying about how we will live. Jesus did not say that the person who takes no thought for anything in his life is blessed - no, that person is a fool. But Jesus did teach that His disciple must make his relationship with God the dominating focus of his life, and to be cautiously carefree about everything else in comparison to that. In essence, Jesus was saying, "Don't make food and drink the controlling factor of your life, but be focused absolutely on God." Some people are careless about what they eat and drink, and they suffer for it; they are careless about what they wear, having no business looking the way they do; they are careless with their earthly matters, and God holds them responsible. Jesus is saying that the greatest concern of the life is to place our relationship to God first, and everything else second.

It is one of the most difficult, yet critical, disciplines of the Christian life to allow the Holy Spirit to bring us into absolute harmony with the teaching of Jesus in these verses.

Washing Feet

From A Gentle Thunder by Max Lucado via the Christ Through the Bible section of my devotional bible:

Jesus Washes Our Feet

I don't understand how God can be so kind to us, but he is. He kneels before us, takes our feet in his hands, and washes them. Please understand that in washing the disciples' feet, Jesus is washing ours. You and I are in this story. We are at the table. That's us being cleansed, not from our dirt, but from our sins...

Don't miss the meaning here. To place our feet in the basin of Jesus is to place the filthiest pasts of our lives into his hands. In the ancient East, people's feet were caked with mud and dirt. The servant of the feast saw to it that the feet were cleaned. Jesus is assuming the role of the servant. He will wash the grimiest part of your life.

If you let him. The water of the Servant comes only when we confess that we are dirty. Only when we confess that we are caked with filth, that we have walked forbidden trails and followed the wrong paths.

We tend to be proud like Peter and resist. "I'm not that dirty, Jesus. Just sprinkle a few drops on me and I'll be fine."

What a life! "If we say we have no sin, we are fooling ourselves, and the truth is not in us" (1 John 1:8).

We will never be cleansed until we confess we are dirty. We will never be pure until we admit we are filthy. And we will never be able to wash the feet of those who have hurt us until we allow Jesus, the one we have hurt, to wash ours.

You see, that is the secret of forgiveness. You will never forgive anyone more than God has already forgiven you. Only by letting him wash your feet can you have strength to wash those of another.

Kitchen Project

The kitchen project is about to begin. The original plan was to take out the furdown above the kitchen cabinets, put new molding around the tops of the cabinets, knock off the popcorn ceiling, take down the wallpaper, put a heavy texture on the walls, repaint, and get new light fixtures. As of yesterday, we've also decided to get rid of the tile countertop and backsplash and replace with formica which also means getting a new sink and we will get a new stovetop. I'm stressed out all ready. There is going to be construction dust all over the house. My eating routine is going to be thrown for a loop, but I know when it is all completed, it will be worth it. I just hope I don't gain 10 pounds in the process.

Here are the before photos:

www.flickr.com

Living Simply

The people who influence us the most are not those who detain us with their ontinual talk, but those who live their lives like the stars in the sky and "the lilies of the field" -- simply and unaffectedly. Those are the lives that mold and shape us.

If you want to be of use to God, maintain the proper relationship with Jesus Christ by staying focused on Him, and He will make use of you every minute you live -- yet you will be unaware, on the conscious level of your life, that you are being used of Him. ~ My Utmost for His Highest

This reminded me of my mother. She was quiet and always working in the background. She served at our church, but didn't draw attention to herself. I'm not even sure most people knew of the work she did - preparing flowers (from her garden) for the altar, keeping the supply closet for religion classes organized and prepared, filling in for the usual organ player, allowing the priest to come over and use our washer & dryer and have lunch with us. I don't think my siblings ever knew that she would always attend Mass on their birthdays. She loved to do kind things for other people and I'm sure there are many lives she touched that I don't know about. I want to be like my mom.

The LORD decided his servant would suffer as a sacrifice to take away the sin and guilt of others. Now the servant will live to see his own descendants. He did everything the LORD had planned. By suffering, the servant will learn the true meaning of obeying the LORD. Although he is innocent, he will take the punishment for the sins of others, so that many of them will no longer be guilty. The LORD will reward him with honor and power for sacrificing his life. Others thought he was a sinner, but he suffered for our sins and asked God to forgive us. ~ Isaiah 53:10-12 (CEV)

He usually gets what He wants

From Traveling Light by Max Lucado via the Life Lesson Devotional in my Bible

In God's plan every life is long enough and every death is timely. And though you and I might wish for a longer life, God knows better.

And--this is important--though you and I may wish a longer life for our loved ones, they don't. Ironically, the first to accept God's decision of death is the one who dies.

While we are shaking heads in disbelief, they are lifting hands in worship. While we are mourning at a grave, they are marveling at heaven. While we are questioning God, they are praising God.

But, Max, what of those who die with no faith? My husband never prayed. My grandpa never worshiped. My mother never opened a Bible, much less her heart. What about the one who never believed?

How do we know he didn't?

Who among us is privy to a person's final thoughts? Who among us knows what transpires in those final moments? Are you sure no prayer was offered? Eternity can bend the proudest knees. Could a person stare into the waning canyon of death without whispering a plea for mercy? And could our God, who is partial to the humble, resist it?

He couldn't on Calvary. The confession of the thief on the cross was both a first and final one. But Christ heard it. Christ received it. Maybe you never heard your loved one confess Christ, but who's to say Christ didn't?

We don't know the final thoughts of a dying soul, but we know this. We know our God is a good God. "He does not want anyone to be lost, but he wants all people to change their hearts and lives" (2 Peter 3:9). He wants your loved one in heaven more than you do. And he usually gets what he wants.

The Habit of Having No Habits

When we first begin to form a habit, we are fully aware of it...until they become such a spontaneous expression of our lives that we are no longer aware of them. ~ My Utmost for His Highest

This is talking about godly habits, but it got me to thinking about my daily healthy habits. There are some things in my life that started out as a struggle to do every day, but now I just do them without thinking about it. There are still some habits that I am still aware of and have to work on doing every day, but here is a list of things that are no longer habits, but just part of my life.

Drinking at least 4 20 oz bottles of water
Journalling my food every day
Running the dishwasher every night and unloading it every morning
Making the bed every morning
Taking my vitamins
Taking the stairs instead of the elevator at work
Wearing a pedometer

Don't Let Your Hope be Stolen

(From a daily email I get from Joel Osteen)

Today's Scripture
"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." (John 10:10)

Today's Word from Joel and Victoria
The enemy has a goal for your life. He wants to steal your hope and joy, he wants to make you so discouraged that you just quit and give it all up. He knows that if you get discouraged and down, you will eventually settle for less than the best, and less than what God wants from you. The right attitude and mindset will prepare you for your miracle, but that can't happen if you're down and discouraged. God may take His time to accomplish what He wants to do in your life, but you can't lose heart and allow the enemy to claim victory. God will allow everything to pass as He sees fit. Your job is to have an attitude of expectancy. The rest is up to God!

A Prayer for Today
God, I know that Your timing is not always my timing. With Your help, I want to hold on to my hope and joy today as I wait for Your answer. In Jesus' Name. Amen.

Take The Initiative - From My Utmost for His Highest

"...add to your faith virtue..." 2 Peter 1:5
Add means that we have to do something. We are in danger of forgetting that we cannot do what God does, and that God will not do what we can do. We cannot save nor sanctify ourselves -- God does that. But God will not give us good habits or character, and He will not make us walk correctly before Him. We have to do all that ourselves. We must "work out" our "own salvation" which God has worked in us. (Philippians 2:12) Add means that we must get into the habit of doing things, and in the initial stages that is difficult. To take the initiative is to make a beginning -- to instruct yourself in the way you must go.
Beware of the tendency to ask the way when you know it perfectly well. Take the initiative -- stop hesitating -- take the first step. Be determined to act immediately in faith on what God says to you when He speaks, and never reconsider or change your initial decisions. If you hesitate when God tells you to do something, you are being careless, spurning the grace in which you stand. Take the initiative yourself, make a decision of your will right now, and make it impossible to go back. Burn your bridges behind you, saying, "I will write that letter," or "I will pay that debt"; and then do it! Make it irrevocable.
We have to get into the habit of carefully listening to God about everything, forming the habit of finding out what He says and heeding it. If, when a crisis comes, we instinctively turn to God, we will know that the habit has been formed in us. We have to take the initiative where we are, not where we have not yet been.

The purpose of our trials is not only to test our worthiness but also to increase it, just as the mighty oak is tested by the stormed as well as strengthened by them. ~ Streams in the Desert, 8/2

I do not expect high place in heaven; I shall be thankful for a little corner where I may love God for all eternity. ~ Blessed Marianne Cope

I do not regret leaving this world; my soul thirsts for the waters of eternal life. My exile is over. I touch the soil of my real country; earth vanished, heaven opens, I go to God. ~ St. Theophane Venard

Those who share in the sufferings Jesus endured for our sake win more treasure for their family than do others who become millionaires. ~ Blessed John XXIII

The only one who has a right to shape our lives is Jesus Christ. We must determine to allow nothing and no one to shape us, not even our own personal experiences, unless they are consistent with the promises of God. In truth, who is ruling out lives, God or our experiences? ~ Francis Frangipane, The Three Battlefields

Trying to be an adult in a world full of children

At some point in life, each one of us must decide what is his highest joy; for the thing that delights us directs us. Generally speaking, a child finds his delight in what he has; a youth in what he does; and an adult in what he is. The first lives for possessions, the second for the experiences, and the third for character. We do not condemn the child or the youth for so living, because neither has reached maturity, but we would certainly wonder at an adult who lived on those lower levels. ~ From Live Like a King by Warren Wiersbe via my Life Lesson Devotional

When I read this, I went to Amazon to find out when it was written because it doesn't seem that our society is condemning adults for living at the lower levels of seeking possessions and experiences. In fact, from what "they" (the media) would have us believe, the only thing worth seeking is possessions and experiences. (In case your curious too, it was written in 1975.) No wonder I can't stand to watch regular television...it is geared for children and I am trying to become an adult.

He continues...

So, every person has an outlook on life, he is seeking his highest joy. Outlook determines outcome. Abraham lifted up his eyes and saw the stars and become the friend of God by faith. Lot lifted up his eyes and saw Sodom and became the friend of the world. Abraham inherited the city prepared for him by God, the city he had been seeking; but Lot lost everything when Sodom went up in smoke. If life is to be rich and meaningful, then our joys must be the highest possible and Jesus tells us that the highest joy possible is to see God.

I want to seek after the highest possible joy. I can't go on living and seeking after the things the world wants me to, I must seek after God. God is the only place I can find joy, happiness, and fulfillment. Everything else is just a substitute and will never fill the God-shaped whole in my heart. Augstine said, "You have made us for Yourself, O Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in You." Amen!

The faithful Christian must not allow any day to pass without devoting some time to reading, meditation, and prayer...for holy reading shows the way to heaven, meditation travels it, and prayer attains the goal. ~ St. Thomas of Villanova

Our sins can weigh us down with discouragement. St. Ignatius of Loyola tells us that discouragement is never from God because it clouds faith and hope. God's love does not deal in punishment as human vengeance does. God's love disciplines us in order to free and purify us - sometimes a painful process - so that we may not die but live in Christ. ~ Magnificat, 7-28-6

God is all mercy and stands with open arms to admit us to his glory. ~ St. Catherine of Genoa

God is true: He has a long memory for his own promises and a short memory for our failures to keep ours. ~ Magnificat, 8-2-6

Panties!

Oh Happy Day!

I went to Target this morning for a battery for my pedometer (which I didn't find) and I cruised by the underwear section to see if by any chance they had any of my favorite panties. I didn't think they would because I haven't been able to find them in about a year and they are not available online. THEY HAD THEM! Yippee! I bought 8 packages of 3 so I have 24 new Gilligan & O'Malley Cotton Hipsters. I am so thrilled. I love these panties - the openings of the slightest banding that doesn't give me panty lines, they are lowrise so no worries about them being seen when I sit and, best of all, they do not crawl.

Praise the Lord for New Panties!

Momentum

It's important to make plans for tomorrow, next week or next year. But there is a difference between planning for tomorrow and living there, making so many plans in our heads that our focus remains in the future rather than the here and now...We must focus on today and the tasks at hand while leaving the worries of what will happen tomorrow in God's hands. ~ Lose it for Life Day by Day

It seems my mind is always swimming with lists of things I need to do and want to do and often times that prevents me from doing anything. I almost feel paralyzed to act while the to do list piles up around me. I begin to procrastinate because I don't know where to start. Then I really lose focus and would rather sit and play a computer game or read blogs than accomplish anything. However, if I can get moving and start seeing some progress, I feel AWESOME and that momentum keeps me going. Often times, just setting a timer for 15 minutes and telling myself I only have to work for 15 minutes is enough to get the pendulum swinging again. That is what I am doing today - 15 minutes of work on my to do list and then a 15 minute break to relax, read blogs, play on the computer, whatever.

I got up at 8:30 this morning and I already feel like I have accomplished a lot:
had my quiet time
washed, dried, and remade the bed
emptied the dishwasher
had breakfast (Sugar Pop cooked)
filed out a rebate form
paid a few bills and reconciled the checkbook
and in 5 minutes we will be going for a walk

I see a very productive day on the horizon and it makes me happy.

Fitting In or Standing Apart?

Questions from the Life Lesson Devotional:

How deeply do you care about fitting in and being like the world? What are the areas of your life where you blend in with those around you when you should not? Ask God to give you the courage and conviction to stand apart when you should.

The first thing that comes to my mind is with my eating habits (not very spiritual, huh?). I tend to try to fit in with the crowd and eat what others are eating. This is the biggest problem at office parties (actually any party) and when we go out with friends.

The other thing that comes to my mind is with my speech - talking about other people, making fun of people, being overly critical and judgemental. OR just being silent when other people are doing it.

There are probably more. I have emailed these questions to work so I can think about them today and pray for God to give me the courage and conviction to stand apart.

God of Perfect Timing

I read this yesterday at Happy Catholic:

Ten Prayers God Always Says Yes To: Divine Answers to Life's Most Difficult Problems by Anthony DeStefano
... One thing that you learn as you progress in the spiritual life is that God is a God of perfect timing. Since he is able to see the "big picture," he knows just when you should move on and when you should stay where you are. And sometimes before you move on he has to "arrange" a thousand different details in order to make that move possible. That arranging takes time.People who travel frequently on airplanes know just what I mean, because they have experienced the frustration of "circling." Usually this happens near the end of the flight, just when you're most anxious to get off the plane ... you've gone into the dreaded holding pattern... The point is that, despite the frustration of the passengers, and despite the pilot's ability to freely control his aircraft, another entity -- air-traffic control -- has made an over-riding decision to prevent the plane from landing. And there's just nothing that anyone can do about it.The very same thing often happens to us in life. We can decide what we want to do and where we want to go, but God is still in charge of "air-traffic control." He sees everything on his omniscient radar screen -- the weather, the airport, all the other planes in the area. Sometimes, for reasons he may or may not disclose, he decides that the best thing for us to do is remain in a "holding pattern." While we're busy circling, he's busy clearing obstacles, solving problems and moving people around until things are just right. Then and only then does he permit us to come in for a safe, smooth landing.

I had prayed earlier in the morning that God would give me a message of encouragement on my job situation. This was an answered prayer.

Product

I use a lot of "product" every day. A limited amount of hair product - but lots of other products.

Shampoo
2 types of conditioner
soap
facial cleanser
lotion
toner
moisturizer
2 eye creams
lip balm
deodorant
spray on conditioner (yes, I have dry hair)
sometimes a hair product
concealer
foundation
blush
2 eye shadows
2 eye liners
mascara
lip primer
lip liner
lip gloss
hand lotion
foot creme (night-time)
cuticle creme (night-time)
perfume

Then there are the optional "pampering" things - various facial masks, facial scrubs, body scrubs, hand scrubs, deep conditioners, shave gel (I don't shave my legs everyday), self-tanner.

Whew! No wonder I struggle to get ready in under an hour. I would really like to get ready in about 45 minutes but I do like to take LONG showers.

Pap Results

Two weeks ago, I had my 4 month follow up pap smear from the LEEP I had in December. She said she would call if the results were abnormal and just send a letter if the results were normal. Well, after being gone for a week, I figured I would have a letter in the mail - Nothing. Slightly paranoid. There were no phone calls showing on the caller ID from the doctor though, but the paranoia said that maybe she had tried my office number first and find out I was on vacation. I had hoped that the place we get are mail delivered had some mail stuck back for us because are box was full from being gone for a week. I had a dream on Saturday night that the doctor called and I had abnormal results. Increased paranoia. Yesterday, I had Sugar Pop ask at the UPS Store if they had any more mail for us - nothing. More paranoid. I didn't want to call the doctor because I was afraid of bad news, but finally told myself that if it was bad I would have to find out sooner or later and if it was good and could relax and stop being paranoid. So, I called this morning. The nurse called me back and my pap smear was NORMAL! Yeah...paranoid for nothing. They did send a letter - who knows where that went (and I wonder what other mail we haven't received).

Anyway...I'm happy that I'm normal and the LEEP has worked. YEAH! If anyone has any questions about a LEEP (now or if you just happened upon this post at a later date because you are having to get one), feel free to comment and I will be happy to answer any questions.