He is perfecting me

Our small group is going to be using the book "Devotional Classics" for our lessons this year. I was reading through the selection for tomorrow evening's group. It is from C.S. Lewis's Mere Christianity (which we read in the fall).

Lewis talks about the natural self and how the claims of "morality" interfere with the desires of the natural self. We hope that when the demands of morality of been met that there will still be a chance to do what we want. But how the more we obey our conscience the more our conscience demands of us

"and your natural self, which is thus being starved and hampered and worried at every turn, will get angrier and angrier. In the end, you will either give up trying to be good, or else become one of those people who, as they say, 'live for others' but always in a discontented, grumbling way--always wondering why others do not notice it more and always making a martyr of yourself. And once you have become that you will be a far greater pest to anyone who has to live with you than you would have been if you had remained frankly selfish."

Do you know anyone like that? Have you been like that? I have - it is NOT a happy place to be. In some of Flylady's emails she talks about not being a "martyr," about doing the things you do to keep your home clean and running for YOU (because you love yourself) and not getting angry with people for "not doing their part." I used to get so angry at Sugar Pop for never making the bed (he is usually the last to get up), but then I realized Sugar Pop doesn't care if the bed is made. I am the one who likes seeing the bed made. Once I owned the responsibility of making the bed and stopped grumbling about always being the one who made the bed, I was much happier and didn't carry around those angry feelings any more. I could go on to list other things like that around the house, but I'll spare you all the details.

How does this relate to my Christian walk? So many people live their lives doing what people expect of them and they grumble about it and it is hard and you feel like you are always depriving yourself of fun and what you would rather do. But, when you start living your life for Christ who is IN YOU, you are finally loving yourself. Living my life for Christ is so much easier than living my life to please others. Trying to please others and be good requires a perfection that is unattainable, but living for Christ only requires doing the next thing He asks of me. He doesn't require perfection from me - He is perfecting me. It will probably take all of eternity for Him to do it, but it is so much easier than when I was trying to do it myself.